For Improved Relationships, Shine!

For Improved Relationships, Shine!

Shine forth essay, improving relationships essay, sun metaphor

I’ve been getting a lot of calls about relationships lately, so that is where this post is coming from. Even problems that on the surface seem physical, often boil down to relationship issues underneath. So I felt like I’d share how I might help someone think through this for a better, more enlightened result.

I love the metaphor that depicts the Source of all as a sun, with each one of us as an outcome, an offshoot, or a ray. Each ray has different coordinates and heads off in a unique direction, by definition splaying apart from each other as they continue outward. Each ray has the radiating essence of the Source– bright, powerful, and warm. Each ray already includes everything it needs. It is forever bonded with and only dependent upon the Source.

Conversely, no ray is dependent on any other ray. Rays are not designed or programmed to possess, dominate, count on, advise, criticize, intimidate, fret about, coerce, direct, interfere with, impose upon, cling to, satisfy, or even take care of any other ray.

There is no selfish grasping between rays, no pressure exerted between them, no entanglement or estrangement, no dissonance, no clutching affections, no opinions expressed, no superiority or inferiority, no comparisons, no bullying or bossiness, no shunning or ostracizing, no fawning, no vexation, no dissension, no polarity, no conniving, no pandering, no frustration, no obligation or sense of duty, no burden of responsibility. A ray minds its own business, and simply shines forth with all its glowing luminosity.

Let the contemplation of this metaphor free up your human relationships. As rays, we don’t overlap or get tangled up in each other, and it behooves us to realize that. The point is for each of us to shine forth unfettered, with no complaining, no envying, no strife, no obsessing about what another says or does or doesn’t do, no worry about what someone else might think. “What is that to thee?”

Simply shine forth, enjoying being an extension, a manifestation, an expression of brilliant light. What do rays do but exhibit all the qualities and attributes of their Source, and advance them onward into the world?

Focus on your own unthwarted shining, in your own uniquely progressive direction. You do not define others and they do not define you. Give up false dependance on relationships other than the one you have with your Source, whom you will always be connected to and can rely on. Doing so will vastly release confusion and improve every interaction you have, ultimately healing them all.

Loosen your personal grasp on “your” people, and exchange your muddled intertwined sense of them for a more ray-like, shine-and-let-shine relationship. See them as an indomitably delightful ray and get on with being one yourself.

Love all with a more inclusive, universal love, just like your Source does; to do so is natural and intrinsic to your being. Let love be noble and principled, while never proprietary, controlling, greedy, selfish, or  possessive. Expressing innate goodness is how we enjoy kinship with our amazing universal family. Let this enlightened approach fill your life and relationships with infinite blessings!

Every single one of us is the light of the world, so be the steadfast ray you were designed to be. The steadfastness of any other ray is not up to us, but is completely assured by the Source, just like it is for you. Your relationship with those other rays is only in objective, jubilant shining.

I work to amplify good wherever I find it. I love color, texture, beauty, great ideas, nature, metaphor, deliciousness, genuine spirituality, and exploring new territory. I encourage authenticity, nurture creativity, champion sustainability, promote peace, and hope to foster a new renaissance where we all are free to be our most fulfilled, multifaceted, and terrific selves. Read more here.


  1. Dilys 1 year ago

    Thank you so much, Polly! That is really helpful. X

  2. Susan 1 year ago

    EXCELLENT ❣️❣️

  3. Sue 1 year ago

    I love this. Thank you, Polly.

  4. Diane Williamson 1 year ago

    This is the MOST relevant, helpful, enlightening, CLEAR and vibrant “ advice”/ inspiration I’ve EVER had. THANK YOU sooo much Polly as I’ve been dealing with for about 30 years. Of course as a lifelong CS I know this but the way you have said it,,, covering every type of situation and emotional response known in relationships, has shed a very bright light ( pardon the pun) on another side of my situation . The side where I have been feeling that I need to correct someone else or fix someone else . Only a week ago this point was pointed out to me and now what you have written cements it firmly . Thank you again from Australia . I’ll be sending this to so many people ! Xxx


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