“We live in a culture that tells us that everything is a matter of simple arithmetic, that an hour three times a week will get us this, that a mere five minutes a day will get us that. We know from experience that it’s mostly impossible, but we keep trying anyway because we find it hard to fully understand the gap between the two. In our minds, there is the intention, and then there is the failure, and the space between is a blur.

“I’m going to name that gap the human gap. It’s a place we barely know because we are so committed to the unreality in which all of life is controllable. The human gap contains all manner of things that are intrinsic to our existence, but which we prefer to believe we can overcome. That includes getting tired, catching colds, running late, meeting other people’s needs, wanting to just switch off for a while, getting hungry, not finding quite the right solution right away, taking half an hour to chat with a friend, screwing up occasionally, or maybe just losing to the will to live a life where discipline is substituted for joy. It includes being waylaid by a beautiful morning frost or an incredible sunset, getting snagged on a really interesting discussion on the radio, agreeing to go out for lunch with your partner who feels a bit abandoned due to all your striving, feeling like you could do with a walk. The human gap is not a gap at all, but a place that is full of all of the flow and flexibility of life, all the ways that our needs and instincts change across the day, all the compromises and negotiations that come with living in a society.

“We are, somehow, incapable of factoring it into our days, but it is everything.”

by Katherine May

Note: I’m not accepting that anything negative is intrinsic to our existence, but I do often find that people need to give themselves a break and stop expecting themselves to perform like a robot. Maybe this is why I think of myself as a rebel, I’m quite content to be diverted by beauty,  take unscheduled time to listen to someone, or to put color to paper whenever the mood strikes, even if I’m supposed to be exercising right then.  I never seem to get everything done, but I do plenty, so I feel like no one needs to compromise their joy for the sake of discipline, while maybe occasionally we do need to find the joy in sticking to the plan and persevering. The point is good comes in an enormous spectrum, and don’t close yourself off to lots of it because you’ve got your blinders on in the name of accomplishment.